I have a co-worker who is very demanding, demeaning, and literally just doesn't treat me with any respect. How can I bring this to my boss without looking like a "winer?"
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Well it really depends on the work environment i.e. is it an office environment v.s. a construction or automachanic shop. The reality is this; where it is an office environment your boss will have to view your complaint as valid though depending on the nature of your complaint (does this co-worker insult or does he just belittle you) which ever is the case this is your right to complain. However if it is a construction or even a mechanic shop should your co-worker sexually harrass you...by law your employer should do something
YOU WON'T LOOK LIKE A WINER IF YOU CONFRONT YOUR BOSS AND SAY;
*"I have a problem working with this individual which in turn affects my work performace"
*" This individual calls me X and Y and this is highly unprofessional and it needs to stop...what are HRs guidelines on this"
You need to state exactly what the co-worker does in non judgmental terms. For example, don't say he is demanding. Say, "Whenever he gives me an assignment he tells me I better have it done in one hour" Be specific and put it in like a question. Like, do you think this is okay, I need your opinion. So you look like you are problem solving, not whining.
Remember the three rules of inter office conflict, That is document, document, document! Then present your evidence to the powers that be!
Don't attack the person; attack the behavior. If you bring this to the attention of your boss, tell him/her what this co-worker is doing but be specific. Give dates, times, places, what was talked about, and what your co-worker said. It's also a good idea to have other co-workers on your side who could corroborate any stories you tell about your co-worker treating you disrespectfully. Be as matter-of-fact about it as possible, and make sure your boss gets the message that it's not a personal vendetta -- it's a situation where your co-worker is behaving in a less than professional manner.
First, go to your coworker directly and communicate in "I" language. For example, "When you treat me disrespectfully [be specific about what this person did and when], it affects our working relationship in a negative way. I'd like you to treat me better. Do you think it would help if we met with the boss on this to get his/her input?"
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